I am crazy excited about this new thing we’re doing on GUF. Like night-before-Christmas, last-day-of-school, Dairy-Queen-blizzards-are-buy-one-get-one-free excited (they’re not, but the excitement you got reading that is about the same level of excitement that I have about this). In an effort to be more intentional about my life and more committed to the pursuit wholeness, I’ve become increasingly aware of the necessity of self-care—a topic that I hope to address often here. (Self-care, by the way, is drastically different than self-centeredness, but we’ll talk about that some other day when I don’t feel like talking about banana bread).
The more I get to know myself, the more I’ve come to understand what self-care means to me. One way I practice self-care is to intentionally seek out or engage with things that fill my soul or stir it up. I’ve found that I’ve spent a great deal of time in my 20s spinning wildly in a hundred different directions while allowing other people’s decisions, societal expectations and social obligations dictate the course of my life. Now I’m deliberately working to slow down the spinning, re-gain control over my life and pursue wholeness on purpose; a significant piece of that is to be purposeful about surrounding myself with things that, simply said, make me happy. And that’s where this beautiful Bundt cake comes in! Baking is one of those soul-stirring hobbies that I am really quite enthusiastic about. Reading is another one of those things. And so I’ve promised myself that each month, I would read one new book and make one new recipe to ensure that I continually set aside time to do something that I love. Then I decided to make it apart of Grace Under Fire to keep me honest, and for those days when I don’t have the words to encourage your hurting heart, I can offer you banana bread.
The Recipe
I seem to always have a loaf of banana bread somewhere in my kitchen or bananas that are about to become banana bread. Banana bread brings me the same kind of comfort that other people get from a glass of Chardonnay after work or their favorite pair of sweatpants+coffee on a Saturday morning. I make it. A lot. Usually when I’m stressed or when I’m trying to process something in my head. Since everyone swears by their own recipe and it’s difficult to convince people to venture beyond their grandma’s version, I went in search of banana bread-inspired recipes. I found this Best-Ever Banana Bundt Cake recipe from Real Life Dinner and if there were ever a time to believe in love at first sight, I’m pretty sure this is it. I skipped her recommendation to finish it off with cream cheese icing and instead opted for a browned butter glaze. And as seen in the photo, I may or may not have gotten a little overly enthusiastic about that whole frosting thing. I’ll let you decide.
The Book
The book I chose for February’s book of the month is called Rising Strong by Dr. Brené Brown. Brown is a professor and New York Times Best-Selling author who studies vulnerability, courage, worthiness and shame–so much of what I’m exploring in my own personal life. Rising Strong is a book based on her personal experiences, encounters with others and research about what it takes for exceptional people to “rise strong” after what she refers to as “being face down in the arena.” Being face down in the arena are those defining and often unexpected moments when life takes a turn and we are left with two choices: to stay down or find the courage to push forward in spite of tremendous pain and fear. These face-down moments can emerge from an ending relationship, the loss of a job, the unexpected death of a loved one, or even from sharing your feelings with someone and experiencing rejection in return. Brown explores the commonalities of the people who are able to rise strong and she found that the common thread was that these people recognized the power of emotion and weren’t afraid to lean into discomfort. They owned their stories rather than allowing their stories to own them.
For a much more powerful summary than what I’ve shared, watch the book trailer (apparently book trailers are a thing) below for a goosebump glimpse into what this book is all about:
Rising Strong Trailer from Brené Brown on Vimeo.
Quotes I Journaled From This Book
-Choosing to be curious is choosing to be vulnerable because it requires us to surrender to uncertainty. But over time, we learn that curiosity, like vulnerability, can lead to hurt. As a result, we turn to self-protecting–choosing certainty over curiosity, armor over vulnerability, and knowing over learning. But shutting down comes with a price–a price we rarely consider when we’re focused on finding our way out of the pain.
-Integrity is choosing courage over comfort, choosing what is right over what is fun, fast or easy, and choosing to practice our values rather than simply professing them.
-Boundaries are hard when you want to be liked and when you are a pleaser hell-bent on being easy, fun and flexible. Compassionate people ask for what they need. They say no when they need to, and when they say yes, they mean it. They’re compassionate because their boundaries keep them out of resentment.
-We can’t rise strong when we’re on the run.
-Regret is a tough but fair teacher. To live without regret is to believe you have nothing to learn, no amends to make, and no opportunity to be braver with your life.
There are so many points in this book that have hit home for me, I couldn’t possibly capture them all in a post (especially when it’s sharing a post with banana bread bundt cake). I’d love to hear your thoughts if you have read this book, and to hear your recommendations for any books+recipes to make for next month!